Friday, 29 October 2010
Wednesday, 27 October 2010
Tuesday, 26 October 2010
Ladies stick this on the fridge!!
Pete 
l
The Man Rules
At last a guy has taken the time to write this all downFinally , the guys' side of the story.
( I must admit, it's pretty good.)
We always hear " the rules"
From the female side....Now here are the rules from the male side.
These are our rules!
Please note.. these are all numbered "1 "
ON PURPOSE!1. Men are NOT mind readers.
( FIRST & FOREMOST RULE)1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down.
You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down. 1. Sunday sports, It's like the full moon
or the changing of the tides.
Let it be. 1.. Crying is blackmail. 1. Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it! 1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question. 1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do.
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all comments become Null and void after 7 Days.
1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.
Don't ask us. 1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one 1. You can either ask us to do something
Or tell us how you want it done.
Not both.
If you already know best how to do it , just do it yourself. 1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.. 1. Jan van Riebeeck did NOT need directions and neither do we. 1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is. 1. If it itches, it will be scratched.
We do that. 1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong.
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.. 1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear. 1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine... Really . 1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as Rugby
or Cricket or Motorsports. 1. You have enough clothes. 1. You have too many shoes. 1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape! 1. Thank you for reading this.
Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping. Pass this to as many men as you can -
to give them a laugh. Pass this to as many women as you can -to give them a bigger laug
Sunday, 24 October 2010
Saturday, 23 October 2010
Friday, 22 October 2010
Thursday, 21 October 2010
Tuesday, 19 October 2010
Banksy - Outdoors
Check out this website I found at banksy.co.uk
He has Just been down our way,and left a deposit. ( Allegedly)
Sunday, 17 October 2010
Acetaminophen this is so funny!!!
Pete
| |
All drugs have two names, a trade name and generic name.
Example, the trade name is Tylenol and it's generic name is Acetaminophen.. Aleve is also called Naproxen. Amoxil is also called Amoxicillin and Advil is also called Ibuprofen.
The FDA has been looking for a generic name for Viagra. After careful consideration by a team of government experts, it recently announced that it has settled on the generic name of Mycoxafloppin.
Also considered were Mycoxafailin, Mydixadrupin, Mydixarizin, Dixafix, and of course, Ibepokin.
Pfizer Corp. announced today that Viagra will soon be available in liquid form, and will be marketed by Pepsi Cola as a power beverage suitable for use as a mixer..
It will now be possible for a man to literally pour himself a stiff one. Obviously we can no longer call this a soft drink, and it gives new meaning to the names of 'cocktails', 'highballs' and just a good old-fashioned 'stiff drink'. Pepsi will market the new concoction by the name of: MOUNT & DO. Thought for the day: There is more money being spent on breast implants and Viagra today than on Alzheimer's research. This means that by 2020, there should be a large elderly population with perky boobs and huge erections and absolutely no recollection of what to do with them.
If you don't send this to five old friends right away there will be five fewer people laughing in the world.
Example, the trade name is Tylenol and it's generic name is Acetaminophen.. Aleve is also called Naproxen. Amoxil is also called Amoxicillin and Advil is also called Ibuprofen.
The FDA has been looking for a generic name for Viagra. After careful consideration by a team of government experts, it recently announced that it has settled on the generic name of Mycoxafloppin.
Also considered were Mycoxafailin, Mydixadrupin, Mydixarizin, Dixafix, and of course, Ibepokin.
Pfizer Corp. announced today that Viagra will soon be available in liquid form, and will be marketed by Pepsi Cola as a power beverage suitable for use as a mixer..
It will now be possible for a man to literally pour himself a stiff one. Obviously we can no longer call this a soft drink, and it gives new meaning to the names of 'cocktails', 'highballs' and just a good old-fashioned 'stiff drink'. Pepsi will market the new concoction by the name of: MOUNT & DO. Thought for the day: There is more money being spent on breast implants and Viagra today than on Alzheimer's research. This means that by 2020, there should be a large elderly population with perky boobs and huge erections and absolutely no recollection of what to do with them.
If you don't send this to five old friends right away there will be five fewer people laughing in the world.
| |
Acetaminophen this is so funny!!!
| |
All drugs have two names, a trade name and generic name.
Example, the trade name is Tylenol and it's generic name is Acetaminophen.. Aleve is also called Naproxen. Amoxil is also called Amoxicillin and Advil is also called Ibuprofen.
The FDA has been looking for a generic name for Viagra. After careful consideration by a team of government experts, it recently announced that it has settled on the generic name of Mycoxafloppin.
Also considered were Mycoxafailin, Mydixadrupin, Mydixarizin, Dixafix, and of course, Ibepokin.
Pfizer Corp. announced today that Viagra will soon be available in liquid form, and will be marketed by Pepsi Cola as a power beverage suitable for use as a mixer..
It will now be possible for a man to literally pour himself a stiff one. Obviously we can no longer call this a soft drink, and it gives new meaning to the names of 'cocktails', 'highballs' and just a good old-fashioned 'stiff drink'. Pepsi will market the new concoction by the name of: MOUNT & DO. Thought for the day: There is more money being spent on breast implants and Viagra today than on Alzheimer's research. This means that by 2020, there should be a large elderly population with perky boobs and huge erections and absolutely no recollection of what to do with them.
If you don't send this to five old friends right away there will be five fewer people laughing in the world.
Example, the trade name is Tylenol and it's generic name is Acetaminophen.. Aleve is also called Naproxen. Amoxil is also called Amoxicillin and Advil is also called Ibuprofen.
The FDA has been looking for a generic name for Viagra. After careful consideration by a team of government experts, it recently announced that it has settled on the generic name of Mycoxafloppin.
Also considered were Mycoxafailin, Mydixadrupin, Mydixarizin, Dixafix, and of course, Ibepokin.
Pfizer Corp. announced today that Viagra will soon be available in liquid form, and will be marketed by Pepsi Cola as a power beverage suitable for use as a mixer..
It will now be possible for a man to literally pour himself a stiff one. Obviously we can no longer call this a soft drink, and it gives new meaning to the names of 'cocktails', 'highballs' and just a good old-fashioned 'stiff drink'. Pepsi will market the new concoction by the name of: MOUNT & DO. Thought for the day: There is more money being spent on breast implants and Viagra today than on Alzheimer's research. This means that by 2020, there should be a large elderly population with perky boobs and huge erections and absolutely no recollection of what to do with them.
If you don't send this to five old friends right away there will be five fewer people laughing in the world.
=
________________________________________________________________________
This e-mail has been scanned for all viruses by Star. The
service is powered by MessageLabs. For more information on a proactive
anti-virus service working around the clock, around the globe, visit:
http://www.star.net.uk
________________________________________________________________________
**********************************************************************
This email and any files transmitted with it are confidential and
intended solely for the use of the individual or entity to whom they are addressed. If you have received this email in error please notify the system manager.
http://www.hlf.org.uk
**********************************************************************
________________________________________________________________________
This e-mail has been scanned for all viruses by Star. The
service is powered by MessageLabs. For more information on a proactive
anti-virus service working around the clock, around the globe, visit:
http://www.star.net.uk
________________________________________________________________________
________________________________________________________________________
This e-mail has been scanned for all viruses by Star. The
service is powered by MessageLabs. For more information on a proactive
anti-virus service working around the clock, around the globe, visit:
http://www.star.net.uk
________________________________________________________________________
**********************************************************************
This email and any files transmitted with it are confidential and
intended solely for the use of the individual or entity to whom they are addressed. If you have received this email in error please notify the system manager.
http://www.hlf.org.uk
**********************************************************************
________________________________________________________________________
This e-mail has been scanned for all viruses by Star. The
service is powered by MessageLabs. For more information on a proactive
anti-virus service working around the clock, around the globe, visit:
http://www.star.net.uk
________________________________________________________________________
This message AAEA228721.2C2B2 was scanned by Smart Computers using Tower2-SmartFish and is believed to be clean.
------ End of Forwarded Message
________________________________________________________________________
This e-mail has been scanned for all viruses by Star Internet, using a service powered by MessageLabs. It is believed to be free from viruses but it is your responsibility to carry out all necessary virus checks. Gloucestershire Fire and Rescue Service accepts no liability in connection therewith.This e-mail is intended for the addressee only. If you are not the named addressee you must not disclose, copy or take any action in reliance of this transmission and you should notify us as soon as possible. Thank you.SMOKE ALARMS SAVE LIVESGo to http://www.glosfire.gov.uk for adviceTHINK BEFORE YOU PRINT - Only print this email if absolutely necessary
_______________________________________________________________________
| _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _Think before you print - only print this email if absolutely necessary.This email and any attachments are strictly confidential and intended for the addressee only. If you are not the named addressee you must not disclose, copy or take any action in reliance of this transmission and you should notify us as soon as possible.This email and any attachments are& ;nbs p;believed to be free from viruses but it is your responsibility to carry out all necessary virus checks and Gloucestershire County Council accepts no liability in connection therewith. |
Friday, 15 October 2010
Thursday, 14 October 2010
Friday, 8 October 2010
Thursday, 7 October 2010
Wednesday, 6 October 2010
Monday, 4 October 2010
Tolerance.
Pete
Tolerance
I am perplexed that so many people in the USA are against a mosque
being built near Ground Zero.
I think it should be the goal of every citizen to be tolerant.
The mosque should be allowed, in an effort to promote tolerance.That is why I also propose, that two gay nightclubs be opened next door
to the mosque thereby promoting tolerance within the mosque. We could call
the clubs "The Turban Cowboy" and "You Mecca Me So Hot".Next door should be a butcher shop that specializes in pork and have an
open barbeque with spare ribs as its daily special. Across the street a
very daring lingerie store called "Victoria Keeps Nothing Secret" with sexy
mannequins in the window modelling the goods.Next door to the lingerie shop, there would be room for an Adult Toy Shop
(Koranal Knowledge?), its name in flashing neon lights, and on the other
side a liquor store, maybe call it "Morehammered"?
If you agree in promoting tolerance and you think this is a good plan,PASS IT ON!
being built near Ground Zero.
I think it should be the goal of every citizen to be tolerant.
The mosque should be allowed, in an effort to promote tolerance.That is why I also propose, that two gay nightclubs be opened next door
to the mosque thereby promoting tolerance within the mosque. We could call
the clubs "The Turban Cowboy" and "You Mecca Me So Hot".Next door should be a butcher shop that specializes in pork and have an
open barbeque with spare ribs as its daily special. Across the street a
very daring lingerie store called "Victoria Keeps Nothing Secret" with sexy
mannequins in the window modelling the goods.Next door to the lingerie shop, there would be room for an Adult Toy Shop
(Koranal Knowledge?), its name in flashing neon lights, and on the other
side a liquor store, maybe call it "Morehammered"?
If you agree in promoting tolerance and you think this is a good plan,PASS IT ON!
=
The Hormone Guide
Pete
|
Friday, 1 October 2010
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)